Elephant in the Room, Skeletons in the Closet

I've been bothered for awhile now at the way much of the church treats homosexuals. In view of that, I wrote this little skit. It involves an anonymous man trying to talk to Jesus about his (straight) friends. All the while Jesus ignores him, focusing instead on the task of opening a closet door.

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"My buddy Fred still struggles, Lord,
when his eyes begin to roam.
But at least it's girlie mags he buys,

and not men he's bringing home."

[Jesus kneels down, and looks under a door]

"And Lord, Tom has a shepherd's heart

that would fit a role pastoral.

Sure he drinks and has a temper,

but he isn't homosexual."

[Jesus rummages through toolbox; selects two small tools]

"Jesus, let me pray for Francis too.

Could you help him lose some fat?

'Cuz he doesn't swing for other teams,

when it's his turn at bat."

[Jesus fiddles with lock on door]

"Lord I'm upset now- please look at me!

My friends need you in many ways!

Just ignore the lock on that stupid closet-

it's only filled with gays!"

[Door opens. Another man falls out unconscious. Jesus proceeds with mouth-to-mouth resuscitation and CPR]